It's 1:49 AM

It's 1:49 in the am and I can't sleep. WHY? Knitting and I had a big, BIG fight tonight and I'm totally mad at it. (There are no pictures to post because my hands are shaking too much in sheer rage.)

Honestly how can a craft I love so much be so BLOODY infuriating!!??

It began simply enough. I knit the remaining 12 rows on my blanket and met my "1 panel a week" deadline. Thrilled that it was only Saturday and that I had a day and a half of "fun knitting" ahead of me I began some other projects.

First I knit the first clue in the Mystery April Dishcloth. That went fine... and fast. What will it be? I don't know. But it will be green.

I finished up the dishcloth and decided to work on the leg of my Ellington sock. Despite the complexity of this pattern- I am L O V I N G it. And readers, this is going to be simply SMASHING when it's done. The yarn suits the pattern beautifully and GAH... there isn't enough good things to say....

... which is why I'll stop saying them. After devoting an approximate 4 hours of dedicated and concentrated knitting the little nagging voice in the back of my head got louder and louder.... "It's too small, you need to go about a size." Instead of listening to this voice, I proceeded to knit further and further down the leg. Then, 15 stitches from being done (this is a LOOOONG leg 90+ rows), the nagging voice wins out. I finagle the needles over my heel and pull the sock leg up and I am BARELY able to get it on. *Sigh* The ribbing was stretched so tight I bet my blood could hardly circulate. The pattern was stretched so thin it went from "HOT DAMN that is amazing" to "HOT DAMN YOU HAVE FAT CALVES". (For what it's worth, and because my mother reads this blog and worries about these types of comments, no, I don't think I have fat calves. The sock made it look like I had fat calves.)

This I could handle. Yes it's disappointing to get so far along on a sock and realize that you're in trouble. I've ripped back much further. So, without a slight sigh of anguish I ripped the thing out and started again. I both went up to the medium size and went a .25 needle up. I knit about 8 rows of the ribbing and the nagging came back, "now it's too big". (Please picture the nagging voice to sound like the really crazy side of Gollum.) I ignored it. And when the cuff was finished I felt like the once delicate pattern was going to look sloppy. I was also worried about having enough yarn. So I ripped it out again.

At this point I knew it was time to give Ellington a time out. Sometimes when I'm mad at a project- I put it in a corner and let it think about what it's done. Usually after a day or two we get back together and move along at a happy pace. I've decided to go back to the needles I was using before and count on the fact that I've added 8 more stitches. I think the 8 more stitches outta make a big difference.

With Ellington in timeout and feeling a little dejected by my knitting, I pulled out some yarn that's been calling to me in my stash and decided to swatch it for the glorious Fireside Sweater. A fun swatch to knit on big needles that will hopefully be a little less finicky than my other current projects.

I knit the gauge swatch and was mildly disappointed to discover that I'm about .5 stitches over gauge. Now, I know I tend to knit tightly, but I usually can knit to gauge... (and yes I swatched for those socks up above... I don't know what happened there except to tell you that swatches are BIG FAT LIARS!)

I couldn't figure out why I wasn't getting gauge. As I always do now, in the face of a new project- I went to Ravelry to read the pattern notes other Ravelers have made. (One of the 90 zillion BRILLIANT features on Ravelry.) I read the notes along and noticed that two people, who are used the same yarn I was planning to use noted that WEBS, the yarn store where I also ordered the yarn from, sent them the "Bulky" version of the yarn instead of the heavy worsted version and were getting curiosly the same gauge as me. (Berkshire not Berkshire Bulky- I'll admit the naming is easy to screw up.)

I had a sick feeling in my stomach when I read that. I'm not a huge fan of big bulky knits. I far prefer the smaller, fine stitches in a project. This project already has the makings of being reasonable bulky, without the addition of super bulky yarn. Sure enough I read the label and the sick feeling washed over me- I had Berkshire BULKY... not the regular Berkshire.

*Sigh*

At this point I just wanted to give up knitting, light my entire stash on fire (yes even the Wollmeise) {My MIL just gasped at that} and run screaming down the street in agony. Deciding that it would be expensive for my husband to bail me out of the looney bin, trying to explain to the cops "her knitting gets her a little worked up sometimes", I Instead just said a bunch of words that I'm pretty sure my mother would faint upon hearing and sat and seethed about being such an idiot for ordering the wrong yarn.

The thing is, I'm usually pretty meticulous about my yarn orders- wanting to avoid this very feeling. So while I sat seething and telling myself that I shouldn't be allowed to buy anything without supervision again, another little voice creeped into my head, "what if this wasn't your fault?" Hmmmm... interesting.

So I logged into my account and found the online receipts of purchase and it turns out that I didn't order the Bulky... but the regular Berkshire. I'm not the big idiot I thought I am. The thing is- I bought that yarn waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back in November and have just noticed today, that I was sent the wrong item.

Now before we send a bunch of hate mail to Webs I feel it's only fair to defend them. I have only had very positive experiences in the past with Webs. Their staff is friendly and helpful and they made a mistake. Mistakes happen. I make mistakes too. Thankfully, nobody died, there are just some nervous looking skeins of Wollmeise in my stash. I plan to call Webs on Monday and explain the situation. It is my fault for not confirming my order when I received it. To be fair, upon a glance you would think that my order was correct. The very slight difference in this yarn name is why I didn't notice and why there was probably an error in the first place.

I'm going to find out if there's away to send back 9 out of the 10 skeins. (I knit the swatch, cut and washed it from one skein, so I know I can't return it.) I might just ask for a credit as I find their shipping rates to Canada a little ridiculous. Then, next trip down to the US, I'll order again- hopefully with better results. This is not a big hate on Webs.... we'll chat on Monday and see if we can come to some mutally agreeable solution. Please send me good vibes when I chat with the staff on Monday that they're agreeable about sending it back. (My idea is that I send it back... at my cost- get a credit for the 9 skeins and the next order I place they send to me- and not charge me shipping. I think that's fair?)

In the mean time- I can't sleep because I feel like an epic knitting failure and that everything I touch turns into crap. I have my knitting class tomorrow and I only hope that my bad knitting juju from today will be replaced with "ALL POWERFUL MOJO" tomorrow and that I don't turn into a lunatic, mistake their stock yarn for my stash and light the whole thing up.

I'm going to try to sleep now. I'll probably have dreams that I'm knitting Ellington out of Berkshire Bulky....