My parents recently invested in a security system for my sister, to replace the table leg with giant screw poking out of it she had, affectionately remembered as "Spike".
Her: "Can you make me a bat cozy?"
Her: "The bat mom and dad bought me is ugly, it needs something, think you could knit it a cozy?"
This last week, while on her vacation, I knit my sister's baseball bat a cozy. (I tend to knit the crazinest stuff while she's on vacation!) Here's the challenge; since the bat would be used as a weapon of self defensive, I couldn't just knit it a cozy, your grandma makes for toliet paper covers. This cozy needed a certain level of "bad ass-ness" that says "DO NOT MESS WITH ME" but is also cuddly enough to sleep next to at night.
Yoda Golf Club Cover by Tracey Rediker
Yarn: Various acrylics kicking around the leftovers in my and MiL's stashes
Needles: US size 7 DPN's
Notes: This pattern is modified to accomodate the bat. I cast on 28 stitches and periodically tried the tube on around the bat, modifying instructions to fit the bat snuggly. The bottom stretches enough to get over the top of the bat, so my sister can remove the cozy if she feels the need to really, REALLY hurt someone. (Hopefully this bat will only ever serve to look cute in her bedroom and won't be something she ever needs.)