What is Wrong With Me?!

Remember all the agonizing I went through when designing Baby Beef and the Magnum Opus? Remember all the whining and moaning about not knowing what I was doing and the ripping back I had to do because it was a pattern I was adapting on my own and I wasn’t sure what was what?

Why in the hell am I thinking, seriously, about doing it again instead of choosing a beautiful, EXISTING pattern, that is so much easier to knit?

Seriously. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!?

When I search Ravelry for “blanket” I’m given approximately 9,600 patterns to choose from. NINE. THOUSAND. SIX. HUNDRED. patterns. And of those NINE THOUSAND SIX HUNDRED patterns, I, apparently, am completely unsatisfied with my options, all nine thousand six hundred of them. What in the what!?!?!?

Is this a knitting sickness I don’t know about? This isn’t starteritis, nor is it second sock syndrome; this is it’s own particular brand of lunacy. Delusions of grandeur maybe?

I have 3 babies on the “blanket radar” right now. I have 1 blanket ready to go, should I ever get around to blocking it. Baby one was born early this year, and HE is throwing a wrench into my plans. I kind of thought HE, was going to be a SHE. Suddenly the white blanket isn’t quite “he” worthy. (Let’s not discuss how I’m gender stereotyping- I am. I’m not sorry.) In the back of my head I selected this particular pattern just in case “he” was not a “she” and I could give it to the guaranteed “she” being born later this month. (Surprise Anne?) That leaves me blanket-less for a good friend who had the audacity to have the wrong sexed baby. (HOLLY!!!!)

Selecting a blanket can go two very different paths for me. Sometimes I see a pattern and am wholly consumed. I must knit that pattern and nothing will stop me. I can usually adapt it for the mom I’m knitting for and away I go. This was the case for the Rainbow Squares (of never ending garter stitch), the Leafy Blanket, the More Than I Can Chew Blanket and even Pink Insanity. I got the yarn and I got down to business. Easy peasy.

But other times my brain just goes completely off the rails. And nothing, absolutely NOTHING is right- and I choose to adapt (usually dishcloths) a pattern. Suddenly this new little mister needs a football blanket and no one has had the good sense to design something that incorporates mom and dad’s favorite teams; the Stamps and the Roughriders. WHAT!? WHY HAS NO ONE DONE THIS!? MUST I DO EVERYTHING MYSELF!?

Apparently the answer to that is yes. I must do this myself. Thankfully I’m not feeling as ambitious as I was with the Magnum Opus. I’ve found a football pattern (Rav link), a Z for the baby and even a mustang (Rav link), that if I reverse it (because why make it easy on myself?) looks like the Stampeders logo. I’ve even found a kind soul in Saskatchewan somewhere who charted out the Roughrider logo (Rav link), so I can play around and make it work for me. (I’m sure with calamitous results the first 22 times I attempt this.) I’m thinking every other square will be lovely, easy, simple stocking stitch. All I need is the yarn and a color inspiration. (And on this rant tangent: WHY is it in my head the color inspiration is BROWN?! A new cute little baby boy DOES NOT EQUAL POO COLORED BROWN. Actually… scratch that, I think that’s actually all they do for the first 3 months….)

I am left with no choice but to traipse over to the yarn shops this weekend and buy me an unknown quantity of block-able yarn in poo brown, hopefully at a price that does not cause me a further conniption.

Next week, when I’m on the blog telling you my envitable sob tale of failure, I want you to give me no sympathy. I want you to remind me that I brought this on myself. There are NINE THOUSAND SIX HUNDRED other options that I could have gone with, and instead I went this route. I need a little tough love right now…

… and maybe a doctor because there needs to be a cure for this problem. And fast.

(here we go again...)